MGTOW and God’s sexual order

One of the reactions to feminism is the so-called “manosphere,” which includes the Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW) movement. I am not going to mince words here: MGTOW is an abandonment of God’s natural sexual order. Most of the men in the MGTOW movement do not have the gift of celibacy, and the Apostle Paul has a warning in his first epistle to the church at Corinth:

I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. — 1 Corinthians 7:8-9

Some translations have this as “burn with passion,” but it could very well mean a much worse kind of burning – meaning eternal Hell Fire. God created marriage as the only legitimate outlet for sex, which He created as a good thing for His creation. In fact, when God created mankind, He gave the commandment to “be fruitful and multiply,” which obviously requires sexual intercourse. The Apostle Paul quotes Genesis in his letter to the church at Ephesus:

For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. — Ephesians 5:31

Yes, marriage involves risk. Asking a woman out is carries the risk of rejection and embarrassment, and that risk is heightened when a man pursues marriage. Even once married, there is a risk the marriage could break apart due to sin by one or both partners. A man could lose not only his marriage, but his home and children even if he is the innocent party. Many men have correctly pointed out that child custody and divorce proceedings are often biased against men, so they want to avoid the risk entirely by “going their own way.”

Abandoning marriage because of the negative consequences of feminism is clearly not what God has intended for most men. Yes, I know that the gift of celibacy exists, but that is rare. So while there are certainly bad women who have been poisoned by feminism (especially “third wave” feminism), the answer to that problem is to seek a good woman, not avoid women and marriage entirely. All of life is risk, and God knows it. Avoiding marriage shows a lack of faith in God, that He will protect and reward your obedience to His will.

12 thoughts on “MGTOW and God’s sexual order

  1. Windy Wilson

    I have long thought the MGTOW was the 21st Century version of Lysistrata, the Ancient Greek Play where the women of Athens go on sexual strike because their men are acting stupidly about something very important (in their case, the Peloponnesian War, in the current case, acting very selfishly and getting the legal system to support and subsidize their wants.

    Like

  2. Every man who ever got married thought he’d chosen a good woman. Every man who ever got destroyed in divorce court didn’t think she would do that to him when he proposed. Every man who had his children stolen from him thought it would never happen as long as he was a good father and husband.

    There may be ‘good’ women out there but it’s impossible to identify them, and impossible to know for sure they will remain good women. And if you picked the wrong one your life could be destroyed. There are no protections for you other than her mercy. While the laws remain the way they are, MGTOW is the only rational path.

    And the laws aren’t going to change, because women are onboard with feminism and women are 51% of the voters. They may tone-police feminism, and mildly criticise the more militant voices of it, but they will do everything necessary to protect their existing advantages. In fact they will continue to make the laws worse, which they are doing.

    Like

  3. Jack G McGee III

    Found a pal who hung himself over a woman.
    Do NOT play the God card. She aborted the child he placed there. Yes, her body, her choice. It is just women no longer care about love, men, motherhood.
    MGTOW was the only sane choice after seeing that.

    Like

  4. The reason I’m playing the “God card” is because my post is a theological post, from an explicitly Christian perspective. I’ve seen dozens of good marriages, and godly wives – marriages that have lasted 20, 30 or 40 years and are still happy and committed. I’ve seen marriages fall apart because of the husband’s sin, or the wife’s sin, or both.

    Feminism – specifically from the 1990’s onward – has been destructive. Modern feminism is about hating men, not advancing women. But you paint with too broad of a brush in saying that all women “no longer care about love, men, motherhood.” The fact that they do care about that is why many women don’t call themselves feminists.

    Like

  5. So, I was married to a woman I met off Christian Mingle. After 4 years of marriage she ended up running 100k in credit card debt up in my name (the last month before we seperated while I was on a business trip), then cheated on me and left me for another man. Then falsely accused me of sexual assualt after I didn’t give her what she wanted in the divorce (completely false allegation won’t get into the case). All of this forced me to file for a divorce and bankruptcy. It also forced me to defend myself from criminal allegations (which were thankfully dismissed but not before costing me my current employment). I was forced to rebuild my life and part of that life is MGTOW. I don’t hate women like the MGTOW communities seem to suggest. I just can’t afford to rebuild my life again. Mentally and emotionally, this was the closest to suicide I have ever been. It was faith in God that saved me, and yes that same faith could lead me to another woman, however where I feel led is to be the protector of my siblings, nieces and nephews now that both of our parents are gone — To be the rock of the family.

    So yes the MGTOW philosophy can be a very negative place with all the hate you read about towards women but it can also be a saving grace for people who have or are going through the craziness that our current legal system brings us. For instance because she ran up the credit cards while we were married it was a marital issue not a criminal issue, had we not been married she would have been criminally liable.

    On a theological level, this celibacy isn’t a gift and you are completely correct. I can’t condone going around saying I have the gift of celibacy. The celibacy being talked about in the MGTOW communities and the one I practice even if the metaphor being used is “going monk” isn’t about religion. It’s about survival and thriving.

    Like

  6. I know a woman who was battered for years by her husband, who then abandoned her and their five children (ages 11 to 17) for another woman.

    I know another woman who was abused by her husband for years, cheated on, and then forced to flee when he threatened to kill her. He turned her grown kids against her.

    I know another woman who had adopted a baby with her husband, who then abandoned her and the baby and was excommunicated by his church after months of pleading with him to repent and reconcile with his wife.

    There is sin everywhere. We live in a fallen world. WGTOW isn’t the answer to nasty men, and MGTOW isn’t the answer to nasty women.

    Like

  7. So we went from talking about how celibacy isn’t a gift to trying to guilt trip the audience and myself into relationships?

    Your point of the article was how celibacy is not a gift. I agree. I told you that my celibacy wasn’t a gift, it was about survival.

    Let’s just look at my specific situation when it comes to the Bible. First off Paul tells us in (1 Corinthians 7:18-28)

    “Now concerning the unmarried, I have no command of the Lord, but I give my opinion as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. I think that in view of the present distress it is well for a person to remain as he is. Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek marriage. But if you marry, you do not sin, and if a girl marries she does not sin. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that.”

    Furthermore my divorce was classified as a “no fault divorce” meaning the two reasons that God allows for divorce were not met in a court of law. Doesn’t mean one if not both of them aren’t true but whole the judge released me from the marriage, by Biblical instruction that does not give me a license to remarry.

    The two reasons a divorce is biblically accepted:

    Matthew 5:32
    But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

    1 Corinthians 7:15
    But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.

    Lastly I have no intentions of reconciliation with my ex-wife. I haven’t spoke to her in years not even looked her up, I am happier to have parted ways.

    The Lord gives us this command:

    1 Corinthians 7:10-11
    To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.

    This command I technically utterly failed at.

    Overall though, no I will not go and remarry and break laws given to us from the Bible to make the world happy.

    Now in regards to MGTOW. While the Bible is the ultimate guidance, I view MGTOW as the modern survival handbook. One would probably think MGTOW means I resent and hate women. I don’t hate not resent women, I loved my mother, I love my sister, and nieces, I have women supervisors and women friends outside my family who I have the upmost respect for and even love on a strictly platonic level. However, do I want or desire to risk my livelihood by becoming legally entwined with another woman — absolutely not. However more importantly do I want to further the wrath of God on my house by blatantly commiting adultery by getting remarried absolutely not.

    Mark 10:11-12
    And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”

    Luke 16:18
    “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.

    Matthew 19:8-9
    He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

    So is your problem with MGTOW truly about celibacy? Based on these verses I would say God expects those who got divorced for reasons beyond sexual immorality to remain celibate.

    If it truly is about celibacy then it is probably virgin men that you should have directed this post towards.

    However, I believe it is about the perception of selfishness that comes with MGTOW. For men to pursue thier own interests instead of working hard to give resources to a woman and children. As I stated above my family still benefits from me. My friends still benefit from me. Is it that difficult to believe that one can still benefit society and have a loving and fulfilling life without the need nor desire for sexual fullfillment especially if one has already experienced sex.

    You can give examples all day of men and women hurt by the opposite gender but that, while sad just further proves the point on why the MGTOW philosophy has spread the past 20 years like wildfire.

    Instead tell me why being celibate after a period of marriage isn’t okay.

    Tell me why Paul says he would rather us not marry if we are able —- to avoid worldly troubles and why you think that does not mean more men and women could potentially have a gift of celibacy if they so choose. In my opinion one only need to be earnest and pray for the gift of celibacy to receive it. I don’t think it’s one out of a million who receive a certain gift.

    Also while I have read the old testament and know the be fruitful and multiply verse we are currently under the New Testament, or New Covanent. So while the Old Testament is great teaching and learning material I am thankful I don’t have to go to the temple and sacrifice animals as payment for my sin. My point is the New Testament is and should be our point of reference.

    Like

  8. I don’t know you and I cannot speak to your personal situation. I am not telling you, specifically, how to deal with your specific situation. Any personal counseling would have to be between you and your pastor. I am writing in broad strokes about the MGTOW philosophy.

    Like

  9. imembracingreality

    Respectfully, you’re overlooking some fundamental harsh realities here about men staying single. It’s true that marriage was God’s design for human society. We’ve strayed so far from God’s design now, even in the so called church, it’s hardly recognizable.

    The Apostle Paul made the case for remaining single and specifically for men. So did Christ in Mark 10, Matthew 19. Did Christ not say “any man that can hear it, let him hear it”? This said immediately in response to the disciples question “is it better that men not marry?”. If “be fruitful and multiply” was a command of God then the Son of God would have repeated it right there. He did not! In Genesis “be fruitful and multiply” was a blessing. Nowhere I’m aware of does God command us to do what our flesh is already inclined to do anyway. Incidentally, nearly all of the fruits’ of Adam and Eve were destroyed, by God, in the flood of Noah. God doesn’t need us to breed. Certainly not in a completely corrupted system.

    It’s true that fornication is a deadly sin and the prescription was marriage 2000 years ago. What does that have to do with the feminist society and church of the millennium 2000? Are men not most vulnerable to sexual sin between the ages of 15 and 20? Historically this is when men married. Now? Churches don’t encourage early marriage, especially not for women. Young church girls are focused on school, college, career and if we’re honest many indulge in casual sex with the most attractive men available to them. Many church women have absurd expectations of the men they could actually attract to a marriage. Most sincere Christian men will have already been forced to either learn to be celibate or succumbed to sexual sin. Be honest, marriage isn’t even an option for most before 25. Add to this the reputation for Christian women to withhold sex from their husbands, the obesity epidemic, feminist attitudes. Frivolously divorcing wives in a biased legal system. Many men who married are living celibate lives! What are we arguing about? It’s nearly over and the primary problem here is the church’s rebellious women.

    MGTOW is the future for many Christian men. Count on it. The only alternative is a church that holds women accountable. Not going to happen now. Liberalism, feminism has been given power to wear out the saints and we’re going to ride this rebellion right into the end of this age. Only Christ can crush It now. The church leaders are addicted to the money they make scratching the itching ears of the rebellious, mostly female flock. As long as a man meets God’s standards MGTOW is going to be the rational choice for many Godly men.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.